New York Love/Hate

As you all know, I'm 37 weeks pregnant. I have been on sabbatical from my full-time job as a high school teacher since February, therefore I have yet to commute during this pregnancy. That has been a gift from the heavens. But alas, unless this little boy comes early, I will hop on the F train to teach at my high school on September 8th and commute daily until I go into labor. Just the thought of squishing on a crowded rush hour train makes me have contractions. Ugh.

My brilliant acquaintance Lynn Harris wrote this short diatribe for the NY Times last week which got a lot of heated feedback. Lots of hatred out there for pregnant women by the NYC masses. Pretty intense to read the comment section and see how evil folks really are.

And I am not a subway seat hog when preggers, believe me. I have a four stop commute, and I honestly feel bad for those of you who have to ride for an hour or more each way, packed like sardines in a smelly tin. And, the bigger I get, the harder it is to get up and down from a seat without a crane. With this in mind, for the most part, I prefer to stand for short trips. That was, until some woman slammed into me when I was 38 weeks pregnant with Alexandra.

I was standing, on my way to work, on a crowded F and this airhead decided she didn't feel like holding onto the pole. The train lurched. SLAM--she went--her full body weight (and she was not a waif) right into my huge belly that I was trying to keep out of everyone's way (it is quite cumbersome to be more than twice your normal width and navigate crowded spaces). It HURT. I doubled over. I was worried she had broken my water (I just peed my pants a bit, thankfully). I yelled at her, "Hold onto the fucking pole!" She shrugged and mumbled "Sorry." I had tears in my eyes--she had REALLY smashed into the belly. Since then I have taken a seat when offered. Even for short trips. And, believe it or not, I have had people FALL ON ME when sitting. I swear, when pregnant am I a magnet for clumsy folks or something?!

I don't feel a sense of entitlement for a seat when pregnant, but I do feel like it's good manners to offer. Even if you have chosen not to have kids, or you hate "breeders" someone bred for YOU--why don't people get that? I don't see why it's made into such a big deal. These folks needed their mamas to raise them better.