An Open Letter...

...to everyone who tells me that I wouldn't be so broke if I didn't live in NYC.

Hi Guys,
Let me preface this by saying that I realize I have been very whiny lately about our finances (or lack thereof). Both Adam and I are continuously appalled that we have such a ridiculous amount of education, are both firmly established in our respective professions, make decent salaries compared to the rest of the nation/world (although they seem somewhat paltry compared to our peers here in the City), and we are broke broke broke. And I'm not talking broke like, "Man, think we're going to have to skip the Opera this year." I'm talking broke like need to budget to buy Adam a new pair of Camper shoes. Yep. But, our biggest monthly expense is daycare, so we take solace in the fact that this financial crisis is finite. Bring on the public schools, baby.

But I am here to clarify the fallibility of everyone's asinine idea that if we left our glorious City we would suddenly have a surplus of money. Let me explain why you are wrong, so you can all stop suggesting that we relocate to NC, CT, Philly, etc.

1. We would have to buy TWO CARS and then insure TWO CARS. We have no car payments now, no car insurance. Yes, renting is a killer when we have to do it, but it's nothing compared to car payments/insurance. Nothing. And multiply that by two. That would be CRAZY.

2. Our rent is wicked cheap here. Believe it or not, our rent is at least $500 less than most of our friends. We live in an awesome neighborhood, our apt is small but the layout is good and it works for now, and if we were to go elsewhere there is NO WAY we'd have rent and/or a mortgage this cheap. So nix that idea.

3. Yes, childcare might be cheaper. I'll give you that. Right now we pay $2600/month for full-time (40 hours/week) childcare for both kids, Nico's childcare includes his food/milk for the day and music class once a week. Alexandra's childcare does not include food, but she gets yoga class, music class, and Spanish and Italian classes very week. Some say if we moved near family they could watch the kids. Nah. Neither family would take on full-time daycare of our kids, and I can't blame them--it's beyond exhausting. I can barely do it, why would I expect someone twice my age to?

And, adding this later here, do y'all know how much teachers make in the Southern states? JACKSH*T. So if I were to move South and teach, my salary would be less than half of what it is now. With no union. No thank you. Don't even mention academic jobs. There aren't any!

4. Our college loan payments, a nice chunk of our income each month, would not disappear if we left New York. Those suckers will follow us forever until 2017. Again, a finite expense--only 7 more years to go!

So all of you who keep hinting or demanding that our financial struggles are because we live in NYC, you are wrong. They are due to childcare costs and college loans, two variables we can't change right now. Believe me. Adam and I have examined this closely. Multiple times. We appreciate your concern, but your solution is not a solution. And, honestly, why would we chose to be broke anywhere else but in the greatest city in our country?

Love, Lori

(ps: I imagine this dollar sign is saying, "See you--a bit--in two years when Alexandra goes to kindergarten, and then a bit more in two more years when Nico goes to kindergarten, and then in full in 2017 when you've paid off those graduate degrees!")