pregnancy hormones attack

Yes, pregnancy makes you overly emotional. Everyone knows that--even those who know jack about pregnancy. But Lord have mercy, today I have been off the hook.

It all started at breakfast with Alexandra. Being ever-so-cute, she was singing "Where is daddy?" (in the tune of Frere Jacques) and swinging her arms. Swoosh! The cup of orange juice flew across the table and spilled all over one of the two outfits that still cover my absurdly large belly and allow me to sit without flashing my poo-cat to my entire classroom (since I can no longer shut my legs due to belly). I stand up, say some choice words a two-year old should not hear, and then break out crying. No, actually sobbing like my two-year old does, mumbling, "I only have two outfits for work and I just did laundry and now I have to do it again" blubber blubber blubber....Adam looked at me like I had two heads (in a loving way) and then Alexandra started crying because she thought I was mad at her. How do you explain, "It's not you, it's me" to a two-year old? And I couldn't stop crying! Finally, I regained my composure, and I put on outfit #2 and went to work.

Seventh period. While starting class one of my students called me over with the typical, "Miss..." and handed me the program from her recently deceased mother's memorial service. I held it in my hand for a minute, looked at the photo of her mom, and literally tossed it on her desk as if it were diseased and started crying hysterically. The whole class was mortified. "Miss, are you okay?" "What's happening?" "Did her water break?" "What'd (student name) show her?" All the while I was literally SOBBING and then blurted out, "Sorry guys, I just can't deal with your dead parents today!" which was so rude and not like me to say but thankfully they laughed, probably because they were terrified at my uncontrollable crying. Then some students tried to hug me which made me cry more. I just kept thinking of her mom leaving her 15 year old daughter and me leaving Alexandra and my mind was out...of...control. And I could not stop the crying. It took about 10 minutes, no lie. HOT. MESS.

Then I cried retelling that story twice to other teachers, husband, and midwife at today's appt.

Then I cried when my biological mom emailed to say she wanted my social security number to put me down on her life insurance in case she died with her daughter. One--she can't die, nor can my half-sister. The thought that now I have two more people to lose that I love made me cry. Two, she would really put me down? Really? I'm like real family? Crying.

I'll probably cry again in a few minutes. Just test me.

Is this a sign that baby boy is coming or just that I'm crazy?